Girls Can't Catch | Keep Your Head Up

With an intro that sounds not too dissimilar to Sam Sparro's Black & Gold, you'd be forgiven for thinking Keep Your Head Up was another naff pop song sampling a classic. And certainly, with auto-tuned verses and a truly awful band name like Girls Can't Catch, the new girlband on the block won't be without their doubters. But anyone who was left weeping at the news of Girls Aloud's one-year hiatus or the end of The Saturdays' Work Tour will find comfort in this track's surging chorus and kitsch lyrics like 'I've had all sorts of fantasies, even romantasies'. Who cares what a  romantasy is. Look! There's one of the girls from Hope! X Factor connections as well? A sure-fire hit I'd say. 4/5.

Little Boots | Hands

Victoria Hesketh, the 25-year-old singer behind the pseudonym Little Boots, has had a momentous first few months in the music business. After working with Lady Gaga’s producer RedOne on Remedy, (this was before Just Dance came anywhere near British ears), being voted #1 in the BBC's Sound Of 2009 poll and collaborating with her childhood idol Philip Oakey of Human League on Symmetry, you would be forgiven for expecting an immense album of intelligent, retro-futuristic electropop. Unfortunately, the futuristic side of things ends with the cover design, but the retrospective leanings of Hands stand firm with a handful of possible Kylie Minogue leftovers.

Stuck On Repeat, the focal point of her EP from earlier this year, bucks the trend of the 80s revival occurring on the majority of the album by sounding very 90s dance and wouldn't have been out of place during the Kylie’s moody Confide In Me era. 

Elsewhere, Tune Into My Heart, (the title, theme and chorus of which are laughably twee), could easily have been snatched from Kylie circa Stock Aitken & Waterman, whilst Hearts Collide, the only track to warrant attention in the 2nd half of the album, at last utilises Hesketh’s forgivably plain vocals in a seductive song that mirrors the sultry Australian pop poppet of recent years.

That’s not to say that Hands doesn't have its more original moments. Debut single proper New In Town opens with a startling melody of stop-starting synths, as does the next track, Earthquake, with its bittersweet lyrics and euphorically melancholy chorus.

Remedy, the planned second single, is a triumphant romp that will undoubtedly be a club smash, and this, or even the sophisticated Click, could have won us this year’s Eurovision.

Little Boots is clearly unafraid of a good batch of cheesy pop, and although her credibility as an artist rises with the knowledge that she co-wrote most of the album, it’s no use being a singer-songwriter with average vocals and average lyrics. For instance on Symmetry, the clichéd opening line is – "You’re the night to my day, and the left to my right", sung without a hint of irony, as Hesketh’s authentic performance throughout confirms.

Yet, even if her lyrics lack depth, her tunes certainly don’t. Intriguing and inventive, it’s a shame that some of her more adventurous arrangements are wasted on songs sang, at times, almost half-heartedly, such as on filler tracks Meddle and Ghost. Unfortunately, the only time the full power of Hesketh’s voice is showcased is on hidden title track Hands, but here she has gone into Kate Bush mode with only a piano as a backdrop. (Note too that her stutter-singing is remarkably similar to that of Kate Nash on Skeleton Song, a track from her own debut, Made Of Bricks).

Relying too heavily on metaphors for Mathematics and closer No Brakes, (in which love is compared to driving a car, ladies and gentlemen), Little Boots assumes that naive persona of young Kylie Minogue singing I Should Be So Lucky with the carelessness of newfound fame. Whether Hesketh’s own fame will last as long as her counterpart’s remains to be seen, but for now it’s clear that Hands is a half-good album at best that, in full, doesn’t quite deserve the status of being Stuck On Repeat.

Beyoncé | Halo

It's not often Beyoncé sings songs she can relate to. Throughout all her big kiss-off hits like Irreplaceable and Single Ladies she was with husband Jay-Z, and after recently stating that she's only ever been with one man (him), she really was in no position to lament about cheating, break-ups or being on her own. At last comes Halo, a song she has no doubt put her heart and soul into given that she's still Crazy In Love with the rapper. A heart-warming delight. 4/5.

Lady Gaga | Poker Face

Just Dance mark II arrives with Lady Gaga's debut single still stuck in our minds. The tribal 'mum-mum-mum-ma's are attention-grabbing, and will never be removed from your mind, but the rest of the song is rather unremarkable. The line 'I'm just bluffing with my muffin' in the bridge should provide a few giggles, but Poker Face is just too repetitive to be anything more than mildly amusing. 3/5.

Bat For Lashes | Daniel

Based on the main character from the cult 80s film The Karate Kid, Bat For Lashes, aka Natasha Khan, builds on her reputation as the spaced-out chanteuse of pop with Daniel, the first single from her new album Two Suns. Haunting and intriguing, Khan's airy vocals weave a captivating story of love found and love lost, with shades of Toyah's bombast and Kim Wilde's desperation (just roll with it, it makes sense after a few listens). Never without a reference to nature - the lyrics here concern 'cinders and rain' - she once again conjures up a cinematic experience in song form. A suitable followup to the equally ethereal Fur & Gold, this is an oddball future classic. 4/5. 

Noisettes | Don't Upset The Rhythm

After featuring on a Mazda car advert earlier in the year, the Noisettes finally release the instant, catchy Don't Upset The Rhythm. Though it draws heavily from the sound of 70s disco divas like Aimee Stewart and Donna Summer, the track still manages to sound fresh and more surprisingly appropriate for 2009. In any other circumstance it would be laughable to reference a "dog and bone", "paradise" and "something super beautiful", especially all in the same song, but somehow singer Shingai Shoniwa pulls it off with style. It's a world away from their indie debut album, and for that alone we must be truly thankful. 5/5.

Keane | Better Than This

If you can get past the obvious intro rip-off of David Bowie's Ashes To Ashes rip-off and put it down to 80s homage, you'll realise frontman Tom Chaplin is, as ever, singing to himself and not the audience. A technique somewhat unique to Keane, it is rather off-putting to hear someone singing to you the line: 'You can do so much better than this'. If I can, then Keane certainly can do too. Examples can be found on their 3rd album, Perfect Symmetry, for instance. 3/5. 

Snow Patrol | If There's A Rocket Tie Me To It

Single number 3 from Snow Patrol's 5th album A Hundred Million Suns, and it's yet more drab MOR. With the lyrics mentioning various aspects of biology such as pulses, hearts and indeed feet, this not only doesn't sound single-worthy, but it doesn't even deserve to be the b-side of a b-side. Without Martha Wainwright on support vocals or the backing of a closing scene of Grey's Anatomy, you are left with a track that makes you wish you did indeed have a rocket for frontman Gary Lightbody. And some rope. 2/5.

Ladyhawke | Paris Is Burning

Despite being hailed by many as one of the best newcomers of 2008, New Zealander Ladyhawke, aka Phillipa Brown, is still struggling to shift copies of her eponymous debut set. The reason why is clear - The Hawke's pastiche of 80's music draws its influences from some of the worst candidates, such as Ghostbusters hit-maker Ray Parker Jr. on her last single Dusk 'Til Dawn. In attempt to be the best straggler of 2009, she re-releases a Blondie-esque single from last July, Paris Is Burning. It's no doubt her catchiest tune to date, but that's not saying much. It's still the aural equivalent of tepid tea, and in a music world dominated by another Lady (Lady Gaga, to be precise), it's unlikely that this will save her album from the bargain bins. 

Sara Bareilles | Bottle It Up

It's ironic that after her debut hit Love Song proclaimed she wasn't going to write, well, a love song, Sara Bareilles releases a single which quite possibly has the most instances of the word 'love' in the history of music lyrics. It's a wonder that the song isn't called Love Song Part II: The Love Song Song. Inevitably, many will scoff at Bottle It Up, but once you're done laughing, you'll hear a lovely little ditty that mixes fragility, tenderness and angst (the almost rap-like bridge is quite the marvel) with panache. Think of a slightly more edgy Carpenters who aren't afraid to sing the word 'shit', and you've got the gist. 4/5.

Boyzone | Love You Anyway

It's an odd thing trying to make an old band appeal to a young audience by giving them a new song with an old vibe. But as 60s music is in (see: Duffy, Adele, Amy), Boyzone must have thought they were onto a winner with this; a sappy track that is essentially a Ronan Keating comeback single featuring assorted guests. Love You Anyway is repetive, with the lyricists trying to trick the listener into thinking the chorus actually rhymes. As for that stiff dance routine in the video... it's no surprise that their manager is, as ever, Louis Walsh. 2/5.